bodilesswarrior | TLV 5 - Video

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TLV 5 - Video

[Barbara is twirling a pen round her fingers with careless dexterity as she leans back in her wheelchair, gaze distant.]

I was going to talk about being a Warden and the responsibilities it entails and the sort of things we need to commit to when we agree to come on board this ship.

[She shakes her head, as the pen spins faster.]

But the truth is I'm not sure if I even have a right to be here. I barely address my own issues, half the time. I know they're there, of course, but there's always something more important.

And when it comes to other people... [A low, bitter laugh.] I ended my engagement over the phone. Didn't even tell him why.

I've used the people I love most. I've manipulated them. I've made them face near certain death, horrific trauma, brutal violence. All because of the mission. The greater good.

[The pen snaps, and she lets the pieces fall.]

Sometimes I think I'm a better vigilante than I am a person, and that's not what the Barge needs.

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You're a better person than I am.

[Barbara shakes her head.]

If I am, it's only because you've acted on your impulses.

[Ink is dripping down her hand, staining her sleeve.]

Do you know how easy it would be for me?

You are not the same as me.

You're better.

Some impulses are better left as such.

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action oh dear

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...This flood's stopped being fun now.

[She smiles, faint but soft.] I'm pretty sure you're a better kid than you think you are.

Well we all know that's a fucking lie, but okay.

Seriously, get off this thing, it will fuck up your shit.

Edited 2013-01-31 23:26 (UTC)

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You're wrong, my dear, that's exactly what the Barge wants. After all, it's why I'm here.

I thought you were just a tailor.

Well, not really.

I am a tailor, it's true and if you'll forgive the boast, a very good one, too.

[He's just a bit more besides.]

But, no Cardassian lives by needle and thread alone. When we come of age, my people have mandatory military service and I, fool that I was, followed my commander.

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Isn't it?

There's a lot of bad people out there and there's a lot of good people out there, and if I'm learning anything from whatever's going on right now, it's that most of us are neither.

No. The way I'm seeing it, Wardens are less 'good people' and more people who can use their 'badness' constructively. And I think that might be more useful to an Inmate who'd have no way to relate to someone who's only got value to them as a role model.

[Barbara just stares, for a second.]

That's...a really good point. [A slight smile.] Thank you, Sara.

I was glad to hear Dick had someone like you.

[Sara smiles faintly in return. She's not affected, and it feels like there's an imbalance here insofar as she's got the power to shut her mouth whenever she feels like it. So she's going to try to keep this short. But Barbara's a friend and she couldn't let this go without commenting.]

Thanks. I'll have to do my best to live up to that.

You have your problems, but deep down you're a good person.

[Her smile is wryly fond.] I think you'd say that about anyone who wasn't just blatantly evil.

It's one of the reasons I like you. You see the best in the world, even though you've experienced the worst. I have a hard time doing that, nowadays.

Edited 2013-02-01 02:49 (UTC)

I wouldn't say it about my dad, and I don't think he's blatantly evil. Maybe a little evil, but not blatantly.

It's taken a lot of practice, I've gotten really good at it.

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....Over the phone? [ Oddly nothing else there bothered him.]

[Oh Doyle.]

Yeah. He was heartbroken, but I couldn't even - I was numb.

And, you know, I could have contacted him later. After I got better. [A thin, bitter smile.] But I was a coward.

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You should hear all the issues I've got sometime. I haven't even told you the problems I've got with you being here.

It's not my fault she disappeared.

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[Charles looks kind of tired and his throat's a little scratchy, but he looks more determined and concerned than anything else.] You were brought here for a reason.

Edited 2013-02-01 03:06 (UTC)

I'm not sure if I trust the Admiral's reasons.

[She frowns, then, peering at him.]

Are you okay?

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I think you're way too hard on yourself.

[A wry, amused smile tugs at her lips.] Maybe I caught it from you.

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The Barge needs a person willing to do whatever it takes to save the people on board. The problem is that none of the Inmates really want to be that person.

I think the Barge could use more people that value responsibility over their personal lives.

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